Sitting at the Suwanee reservation listing to the tribe members banter among themselves, Max is drawn to the book in his pocket. He slips it out, feeling the worn bindings and tracing the word “Amber” etched into the soft leather cover. He opens it and pulls his pen from his shirt pocket and begins writing.
Journal — July 14, 1901 #
Amber;
It has been a while since I’ve had a chance to write. Life has a funny way of getting away from you.
Where to begin…
Since the last time we spoke, Jez and I have become extremely close. She really is everything I’ve ever dreamt of. She’s also moved into the house. It has been wonderful being able to share the space once more.
I’ve been able to help her as well. She kept a bit of a secret from me at first. I think she feared what I would think if I found out. But with some reassurance, she did finally come to me with it. Jez had been hiding an addiction to some concerning substances. She went away for a week to receive care, and came back, perhaps not as well off as when she left. I’ve made it my mission to make sure she sees the other side of it. I’ve spoken to some close friends, and sought help from professionals here.
I know that I will always be by her side and my love for her will not let her be hurt by this any longer.
In this journey together, I realized something profound. That I loved her. I knew I felt a connection with her early on. But, how she looked at me, how she hung on every word and how she felt in my arms, it felt right.
The other day, on the 11th… I did it. I had been holding on to a ring that I knew would be the one. I didn’t know when the right time would be, but at that moment, I dropped to one knee in front of our home and I proposed to Jez.
Of course, she said yes. She nearly screamed it. She cried and threw herself around me, and we shared in that moment together.
Jezebel Stonebridge. It has a nice ring to it, doesn’t it?
Of course, the last while has not all been good news. I found out that Cat & Pepper’s daughters both contracted Tuberculosis. They were quarantined in the Ellie’s house near the Ranch. I dropped off provisions to the house once, and I was able to talk to her, from a distance. It was the last time I saw her alive. She succumbed about a week later.
I spoke to Bearchild, her husband, a few times. I felt his pain deeply. I understood what he was going through… What he is going through. When she passed, I sent him a letter of condolence. It was a tough letter to write, but the words needed to be said. I hope that he pulls through, but I know it will be a hard journey. I sent a letter to Cat and Pepper too. Sincerely, I hope their journey to healing goes well.
Gosh, there is so much I could say. I’ve been lacking in my letters, but life has moved so quickly, it’s been hard to find the time.
It’s been a long journey to this point. I never thought I would be here again. Jez has become the one person that I cannot live without. I want for nothing, and my goals are slowly coming together in all the ways that matter, save one.
I know, after so many years, that our time together has finally come to pass. If by some miracle you ever read these journals. Know that I loved you. I still do. But I also know that despite my reaction, you would have wanted me to move on.
So I am.
This will be my last letter to you, Amber. I have spoken to the spirits and I hope that wherever you are you have found peace.
As have I.
Max closes the journal and carefully wraps the it with a ribbon and ties it tight. He then wraps the journal in a silk cloth and slips it into his bag. He pauses looking in at the wrapped book, his mind drifting for a moment before he finally closes the bag and stares into the campfire contemplatively, thinking about his future and his new life ahead of him.